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Wish You Were Here

Yes, the blog has been quiet. I’ve been tied up doing a lot of reading for my classes. I’m pursuing a Masters of Fine Arts in writing, but the real reason is that I’ve dedicated much of my energy to healing from my wife’s death. It’s not exactly been entirely productive. I HAVE made progress trying to deal with my
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Hands1

This Is Why I Write

Words touched this heart March 28, 2015 Bob Marcotte, your Valley Voices piece, “The sad, silly, single man who orders the same dinner every Friday night” (March 14) reached my heart. How beautiful it is to see someone with a love like yours for your dear wife. The way you described your cast iron heart-shaped vault that you carry with
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TheWall

A VOID AT ALL COSTS

  Void/adjective Completely empty. synonym: empty, vacant, blank, bare, clear, free, unfilled, unoccupied According to the interwebby, the average lifespan nowadays is 75 years. If that is true, then she died thirteen years too early, and I have twenty left. I have no words to address the injustice, so I will rely on those of others. “Nobody will protect you from your suffering. You can’t cry it
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GetUp

The House of Mirrors Will Shatter

Recently I was honored to have a piece I wrote published in the Fresno Bee. I am overwhelmed by the positive responses it received, but it also led to many questions from people who are just starting their cancer or care giving journey. It breaks my heart that so many have to follow the path my wife and I did.
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PlayingWithMischief

On the First Anniversary of Her Passing

I was born in a place people only passed through on their way to somewhere else. I was raised at a vague address, in a locale that went unnoticed and no one bothered to put energy into forgetting. God created the heavens and the earth from nothingness. I know this for a fact because that’s where I lived.  Every star
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GetUp

Somedays It Feels Just Like This

It is grotesque.  Just as the twists and turns drawn on a map cut the world into little pieces, so they did to you, except your scars led inward and passed enormous pain on the way out.  We kept faith with the promises of saints and science, they plotted our course with  best intentions, but we ended up some place
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TheWall

Hinds Hospice’s new Wall of Remembrance A “Forever” Place for Families

“These are not just letters, and this is not just a wall. It’s a place we can meet, and talk, and be together again. For my little family, this is where conversations can be picked up where we left them, and future plans made. This will be a unique place on earth where I know I can always find her,
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Links of Love

A rainbow framed my destination until it gave way to a nightfall with a near full moon. The tree was still and dark, barely visible in the faint light of nearby neon signs. This was the evening of the “Lights of Love,” a ceremony both sacred and informal, hosted by Hinds Hospice. The tree remained frosted only by moonlight until
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Six Tips to Emotionally Support a Loved One with Terminal Cancer

Today, I gladly turn my blog over to Michelle Wittmer and the good people at the Mesothelioma Center. Since my wife, Carole, passed, I have been asked often about when the appropriate time is to consider hospice and how to be a better caregiver, but Michelle’s words are special. Please read them and comment. Thank you Michelle! Six Tips to
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Ladyofthelake

A Warrior’s Request

Tonight, Mischief the cat is sleeping on my computer bag on the table in front of me, Reggie the collie-mutt sleeps next to me on the couch. It would appear to be another night of nirvana at home, but it is not. Tomorrow, and the day after, I go to war. I am not a warrior by any definition. I
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